Tag: <span>Wellbeing</span>

Breath Training

Focused Way to Strengthen Erections

  • March 11, 2019March 28, 2020

From my tantric library, “to promote good erections, we have to promote the flow of energy to the lingham (lingham is the sanskrit word for penis). Any man regardless of age can promote the supply of oxygen to his lingham.” – Lingham massage, awakening male sexual energy, by M.Riedl and J.Becker.

The following is a list of exercises that help with increasing oxygen supply to the lingham.

Breath training: focused, deep breaths in a relaxed rhythm, paying attention to your pelvic floor, testicles and lingham. Breathe into your lower abdomen and mindfully send towards your pelvic floor.

Sports: endurance sports (promotes stamina), tennis (promotes ability to react to stimuli), hula hoop exercises or salsa dancing (promotes circulation to hip area).

Pelvic floor exercises: increases circulation to the pelvic floor, see pelvic floor exercise video from Physio Fitness Tim Keeley.

Yoga: exercises such as the cobra promote circulation.

Starting one of these exercises can help promote circulation to the pelvic floor and lingham. Practicing these exercises regularly means the benefits will build.

This blog post contains extracts from Lingham massage, awakening male sexual energy, by M.Riedl and J.Becker.

If you are unsure about starting any new exercise, you should consult your doctor.

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Expand Your Sensual Experiences

  • August 14, 2019March 28, 2020

Expand your sensual experiences with this list of essential reading to expand your mind and intimate sensual experiences.

Let me be clear, I think Fifty Shades of Grey is an atrocious book which is badly written and doesn’t give an accurate depiction of BDSM. There is a world of better books out there from more reputable sources.

Here’s more from an article by Dr. I. Kerner…

But with the blockbuster success of “Fifty Shades of Grey,” many people are curious about dipping their toes (not to mention other body parts) into more sexually adventurous waters and sensual experiences.

I’m always careful to make clear that while the adventures of Ana and Christian may make for a compelling erotic yarn, their story is by no means an accurate depiction of BDSM relationships (bondage, discipline, dominance, submission, sadism, masochism), nor is “Fifty Shades” any sort of guide book.

For instruction on that topic, you’ll need to turn to the works of true sex-positive educators such as Clarisse Thorn or Tristan Taormino and their books “The S&M Feminist” and “The Ultimate Guide to Kink,” respectively.

But there’s no denying that “Fifty Shades” has sparked widespread interest in how to improve our sex lives — and what better way to do that than via a good “how-to” book?

If you’re uncomfortable talking about sex to your friends, doctor, therapist or even your partner, such books can be an important resource, whether they impart new information, help you work through an issue, inspire you to become more adventurous or simply turn you on.

So, in the spirit of sharing, I asked some of my favourite sex experts to pick their favourite books on sex and sensual experiences.

Debby Herbenick, a research scientist at Indiana University and the author of “Sex Made Easy:”

“Hands down, I recommend ‘The New Male Sexuality‘ by Bernie Zilbergeld. A classic in the field, it gives a rich picture of men’s sexual lives including myths they’re taught about sex and common problems such as erectile issues, communication blocks and rapid ejaculation as well as solutions for these problems.”

Joe Kort, a clinical sexologist and founder of the Center for Relationship and Sexual Health:

“I recommend Jack Morin’s ‘The Erotic Mind,’ which helps remove the shame of sexual behaviors and fantasies by understanding what they mean in a nonsexual way. Morin addresses where fantasies and desires come from and how shame can be removed and replaced with healthy acceptance for individuals and couples.”

Amy Levine, sex coach and founder of Ignite Your Pleasure:

” ‘Hot Sex: Over 200 Things You Can Try Tonight‘ by Jamye Waxman and Emily Morse is a fun, sensual, seductive, creative and tantalizing book filled with more than 200 ways to tease, play, entwine and explore. When I coach couples who are in a sex rut, I suggest they use this book as a tool.”

Laura Berman, sex educator, researcher and therapist:

“If I had to pick, I would choose either ‘The Anatomy of Love‘ by Helen Fisher or ‘The 5 Love Languages‘ by Gary Chapman. Both are extremely helpful for couples to understand how men and women are wired differently and to learn how to love one another in a way that lasts.”

Justin Lehmiller, Harvard University social psychologist and online sex columnist at The Psychology of Human Sexuality:

” ‘The Technology of Orgasm‘ by Rachel Maines chronicles the history of ‘hysteria,’ a bogus female medical condition that led to invention of the vibrator. Maines’ book is a meticulously researched, fascinating and humorous look at the origin of hysteria and the birth of the motorised sex toy.

“I also adore ‘Bonk: The Curious Coupling of Science and Sex‘ by Mary Roach, which traces the history of how scientists have studied sexual arousal and orgasm in a very engaging way that refuses to take itself too seriously and never gets bogged down in jargon or technicalities.

“On a personal level, ‘Bonk’ holds a special place in my heart for helping me realize how much fun a career in sex research could be.”

Megan Andelloux, certified sexuality educator and sexologist:

” ‘America’s War on Sex‘ by Marty Klein describes ridiculous sex laws and research that Americans are led to believe are true. It’s a must-read book for anyone interested in sociology, psychology, sexuality education, law and parenting.

“I’m also a fan of ‘My Secret Garden‘ by Nancy Friday, which discussed women’s fantasies well before erotica became truly popular.”

I’ve read and recommend many of these books myself, and this list is only the beginning of many exceptional works worth exploring and learning from.

In my opinion, no list would be complete without Esther Perel’s “Mating in Captivity,” an excellent guide to integrating a sense of sexual mystery into long-term relationships.

And on a personal note, in 10 years of writing sex books, my first, “She Comes First: The Thinking Man’s Guide to Pleasuring a Woman,” remains my most popular.

At the time, I often mused that many men — through no fault of their own — knew more about what was under the hood of a car than under a woman’s clothes or what was behind her orgasm.

In writing “She Comes First,” I am grateful to the Federation of Feminist Women’s Health Centers and their book, “A New View of a Woman’s Body” (unfortunately now out of print) and to Rebecca Chalker’s excellent book, “The Clitoral Truth.” Any man or woman truly interested in deepening their knowledge of a woman’s full sexual potential should give this book a read.

Expand your knowledge on sensual experiences and get reading.

Your Tantric Massage Experience

This blog post is adapted from an article authored by Dr. I. Kerner and can be found here https://www.goodinbed.com/blogs/sex_doctors/2012/08/great-books-about-sex/


Blog

Mindfulness Changes Your Brain

  • August 21, 2019March 28, 2020

Recent research provides strong evidence that practicing non-judgmental, present-moment awareness (a.k.a. mindfulness) changes the brain. Mindfulness changes your brain.

We contributed to this research in 2011 with a study on participants who completed an eight-week mindfulness program. We observed significant increases in the density of their gray matter. In the years since, other neuroscience laboratories from around the world have also investigated ways in which meditation, one key way to practice mindfulness, changes the brain.

In 2014 a team of scientists from the University of British Columbia and the Chemnitz University of Technology were able to pool data from more than 20 studies to determine which areas of the brain are consistently affected.

The first is the anterior cingulate cortex (ACC), a structure located deep inside the forehead, behind the brain’s frontal lobe. The ACC is associated with self-regulation, meaning the ability to purposefully direct attention and behaviour, suppress inappropriate knee-jerk responses, and switch strategies flexibly.

People with damage to the ACC show impulsivity and unchecked aggression, and those with impaired connections between this and other brain regions perform poorly on tests of mental flexibility: they hold onto ineffective problem-solving strategies rather than adapting their behaviour.

Meditators, on the other hand, demonstrate superior performance on tests of self-regulation, resisting distractions and making correct answers more often than non-meditators. They also show more activity in the ACC than non-meditators. In addition to self-regulation, the ACC is associated with learning from past experience to support optimal decision-making. 

The second brain region we want to highlight is the hippocampus, a region that showed increased amounts of gray matter in the brains of our 2011 mindfulness program participants. This seahorse-shaped area is buried inside the temple on each side of the brain and is part of the limbic system, a set of inner structures associated with emotion and memory. It is covered in receptors for the stress hormone cortisol, and studies have shown that it can be damaged by chronic stress, contributing to a harmful spiral in the body.

Indeed, people with stress-related disorders like depresssion and PTSD tend to have a smaller hippocampus. All of this points to the importance of this brain area in resilience—another key skill in the current high-demand business world.

This blog post, Mindfulness changes your brain, is adapted from an article that appeared in HBR, https://hbr.org/2015/01/mindfulness-can-literally-change-your-brain

Your Tantric Massage Experience