Tantric Blog - Page 10 of 12 - Tantric Massage London

Quote of the Day

March 11, 2019March 28, 2020

“When you look upon another human being and feel great love towards them, or when you contemplate beauty in nature and something within you responds deeply to it, close your eyes for a moment and feel the essence of that love or that beauty within you, inseparable from who you are, your true nature. The outer form is a temporary reflection of what you are within, in your essence. That is why love and beauty can never leave you, although all outer forms will.” – by Eckhart Tolle, Stillness Speaks

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Tantric Massage, a Pathway to Experiencing Multiple Orgasms

March 11, 2019March 28, 2020

Tantric Massage can be a pathway to experiencing multiple orgasms.

London Tantric Massage Leading To Intimate Pleasure

The experience of an orgasm often bookmarks the end of a sensual experience. However, the experience of a much deeper, full release leading to a multiple orgasm is a sensation that can be experienced through London tantric massage and can benefit intimate pleasure by:

Enabling the intimacy to last longer as you both experience techniques to prolong sensations of arousal
Experiencing a deeper awakening of your sexual energy that can lead to a multiple orgasm
Learning to have ejaculation control and the ability to get in sync with your partner

Techniques For Successful Tantric Massages

Tantric massage techniques are very valuable in leading you to experience orgasm control with the potential of a deeper orgasm for men and for women through delaying the initial orgasm and prolonging the experience with tantric techniques.

Tantric massage incorporates full body massage, with simple rhythmic breathing, exploring the whole body and stimulating the intimate pleasure zones through massage in a way that prolongs the pleasure experienced. The idea is to be fully relaxed through massage allowing you to be submerged in to a blissed out state where the arousal experience can be fully appreciated as you receive the loving touch of your tantric partner.

A much deeper and fuller release can send waves of energy flowing throughout the whole body. I have seen many experience this full body orgasm as they experience a deeper, more “full” sensation of release. In my own sensual practice I have used tantric techniques to prolong my own orgasm, experiencing the different sensations that a tantric orgasm can create.

The tantric orgasm is not a rushed one; allowing time for your whole body to unwind, finding a relaxed space, enabling you to open up to a slow burn of arousal, coming up to the point of orgasm, stopping just before the point of no return and after a few minutes of rest beginning the arousal experience again. The repeating of this many times can lead to a deep, full release with the potential of a multiple orgasm.

There are some good resources that can begin your exploration of tantric massage techniques. These two books in particular are excellent resources that give a good foundation for the tantra ethos and practical guidance.

“Lingham massage, awakening male sexual energy” by Michaela Riedl and Jurgen Becker, & “Yoni Massage, awakening female sexual energy” by Michaela Riedl.

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Preparing to Offer Your Partner an Intimate Tantric Massage

March 11, 2019March 28, 2020

The first phase of preparing to massage your partner is to begin with the intention to honour them and enabling them to receive.

As the giving partner, prepare a loving, pleasant and warm space. The space can include fresh towels to lay on, a calm atmosphere can be created by candles and relaxing music. Prepare all the things you will need for the massage including oil (e.g. grapeseed oil) and towels. You may want to warm the oil by placing the bottle of massage oil in a warm cup of water. As the giving partner lead the massage session.

Establishing Initial Physical Contact in the Tantric Massage

You can choose to sit with your partner, facing each other, in the space you have created for the massage. Ask your partner to give you their hand and take their hand in a gentle and loving hold. Then offer them your hand, in return to hold. This creates a connection between you. Even though you are the one giving the massage, it is impossible to give with your touch in a loving and meaningful way without also experiencing touch that is loving. Now offer a personal invitation, such as “I invite you on a sensual journey”, and you can add more to the invitation as you like.
Sit down behind your partner, and place your arms around them in an embrace, enable your partner to lean against you resting their head against you. In this intimate embrace you can breathe slowly in rhythm with each other, this will relax both of you, and create a physical harmony between you.

Beginning the Massage

You can then invite your partner to lay on their stomach. With feather light touches gently stroke your partners back with your finger tips, with long slow touch, or teasing touch, caress their hair, lightly touch their ears. Touch their whole body in this way, from their head to their toes.

Test the temperature of the oil before applying to your partner’s body. Pour a little oil into your hand and with care in slow movements distribute the oil over your partners back, arms and legs.

Let your hands glide like waves and flow steadily across your partners body, with the oil between your hands and your partners body, this will enable the gliding motion. Have the intention to lovingly touch your partner, changing the speed or the pressure as desired, be careful to avoid the spine, and any other bony parts of their body. Focus on fleshy parts of the body, where the areas of muscle are. If your wrists are loose this will enable you to massage in a soft and gentle way.

Begin by massaging your partner’s back, shoulders, spend time here as this is where a lot of tension is stored. Include the arms, gently gliding over them. Then move to your partner’s legs, first one leg then the other. Take your time, explore your partner’s body. When you are ready invite your partner to turn over.

When your partner is laying face up, place your hand on their heart and the other hand on the crown of their hand. Take a moment here. Then begin again, touching the whole body lightly. Apply oil. Massage their body from head to toe, simply through gentle, slow touch, aiming to embrace their whole body.

Finishing the Massage

When you are ready to complete the massage hold your partners hand and then gently let go. As your partner gently wakes up from their relaxing massage spend some time in an embrace, and offer them a glass of water.

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The Character of a Kiss

March 11, 2019March 28, 2020

In an age where social media is accused of ruining the way we communicate and express ourselves the internet virtual sphere has to stand up to criticism.

As human beings, we crave connection, we are simply wired that way. An authentic method of connection is through face to face interaction and communication. Studies show that only 7% of communication is based on the written or verbal word. Leaving 93% of communication based on nonverbal body language. When your words and mind are saying, one thing but your body language is saying something else.

Virtual communication looses so much meaning, it’s only when we can hear a tone of voice or look into someone’s eyes that the true meaning of their words can be understood.

But the internet does have a few wonderful surprises up its sleeve…. like the Send A Kiss campaign by Burberry, where you can send a kiss to a lover, you can take a photo of your own virtual kiss and send it along to the object of your affection, and while you are waiting for their reply explore the world of kisses, which lights up the world showing you which countries have sent the most kisses so far.

In an age of the virtual, authentic connection is more satisfying than the binary variety, but it does still offer up some wonderful ways to express connection and adoration.

Explore the world of kisses with Burberry

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The Male Orgasm

March 11, 2019March 28, 2020

Many men will try and learn everything they can about pleasing their partner to enjoy satisfying warm blooded sensuality and intimacy, but what about you? Do you really have any clue about your own male orgasm?

It’s possible for men to experience an orgasm without an ejaculation. Believe it or not, the male orgasm and ejaculation are two different things, let me explain.

Through tantric massage I have seen men experience orgasms without ejaculating, and this usually surprises them as they have never experienced this before. Usually the orgasm without ejaculating can be a very full orgasm, as with most authentic tantric orgasm experiences. Sometimes this is called a ‘dry orgasm’.

Dry orgasm: when a male experiences orgasm without ejaculation. Orgasm and ejaculation are two separate processes that often occur simultaneously. However, a dry orgasm can also occur before puberty, and in males who experience retrograde ejaculation, from www.goodinbed.com.

Physiologically the male orgasm consists of the contraction and pulsating most guys feel in their penis, prostate and pelvic region. These sensations are met by a faster heart rate, quickened breathing, muscle tensing, anal, sphincter and PC (pubococcygeus) muscle contractions, and an increase in blood pressure, which then result in a sudden release of tension.

Right before orgasm, seminal fluids build up at the base of the penis in the urethral bulb. This reaps the familiar feeling that you’re about to ejaculate. Then, whilst reaching orgasm, your testicles tighten up close to your body, and your urinary tract shuts down so that your ejaculate can exit from your penis rather than your bladder. All those muscle contractions signify that orgasm is taking place.

Ejaculation, however, is a spontaneous muscle spasm: A reflex that arises at the base of the spine and causes the ejection of semen this “spasm” that gives rise to a great sensation.

A dry orgasm can happen intentionally and not so intentionally. A well trained PC muscle (pubococcygeus) can lead to orgasm without ejaculation. The PC muscle goes from the pubic bone to the coccyx horizontally, creating a comfy hammock of a pelvic floor. It controls urine flow as well as involuntary contractions during orgasm (note: not ejaculation). By voluntarily contracting the PC muscles during Kegel exercises, both men and women can strengthen their perineal core. This helps with erectile dysfunction, premature ejaculation and orgasming without ejaculating.

Whilst control through PC muscle exercises can give benefits such as stronger orgasms, it’s worth saying that focusing on a particular outcome e.g. a dry orgasm can detract from the enjoyment and spontaneity of sensual enjoyment and play.

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Tantric Massage Reconnection

March 11, 2019March 28, 2020

Tantric massage reconnection describes the ability for tantric massage to open the opportunity for you to connect to your body, feeling aware of your full body and the sensations you experience.

There are many aspects to Tantra, from the conscious channelling of sexual energy, to a celebration of acceptance, awareness of your body, spontaneity, focussing your sexual energy to experience body orgasms that are deep and prolonged. Breath work similar to that used in yoga can be used to help you relax and connect to your body, unwinding from the busy life you experience.

A tantric massage in London integrates elements from ancient tantric traditions combined with holistic massage, allowing the whole self to dissolve in to a realm of pampering and bliss.

Massaging the body into a state of relaxation, touch that caresses your body, intimately massaging the receiver and awakening their sexual energy.

Throughout the tantric massage the sexual energy is brought up to peaks and allowed to ebb away again, as your whole body relaxes using long and deep massage strokes.

Tantric massage reconnection is the opportunity that tantric massage offers to improve the quality of your connection to your body and enables you to re-focus your sexual energy in a way that is nurturing and promotes wellbeing.

Tantra and tantric eastern traditions are ways of living with consciousness about your being, being aware in each moment, of yourself, those around you and to the full expression of existence, choosing an openness to life, in every thought and emotion.

You may have seen the tantric massage for men include the word Lingam, this is simply the Sanskrit word for the intimate male body. Tantric massage for women often included the word Yoni which is the Sanskrit word for the intimate female body.

It is best to suspend all expectations or goals and approach each session as an exploration of new sensations. The goal orientated mind is set in its ways. Exploration and finding new experiences for your body, your sensuality, your sense of self, requires an openness.

The tantric massage experience is not solely to achieve orgasm, although orgasm is often a pleasant and welcome part of the Lingam or Yoni massage experience. Tantric massage is about being able to receive pleasure. When orgasm does occur it is usually more expanded, more intense and more satisfying. Tantric Lingam or Yoni massage gives you the opportunity to enjoy a full body massage, including the intimate part of the body, to receive pleasure and relax into yourself.

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Full Body Orgasm

March 11, 2019March 28, 2020

A full body orgasm also known as an energy orgasm can be described as an orgasm which fills your whole body with the pulsating sensation of arousal and pleasure. It can sometimes make your whole body pulsate and can feel like a warm glow of energy.

Here’s another description:

‘My erection was harder than normal, and twitching rhythmically of its own accord. ‘The twitching became more intense until it merged into an amazing continuous tingling sensation. I thought I was going to ejaculate, but instead, the tingling spread from my genitals to my stomach and legs, then all over my body. ‘
I wondered what was going on, but it felt so good, I just relaxed and let it continue. ‘After a few minutes, my breathing became shallower and more rapid, then my whole body went rigid, and a wonderful warm feeling swept over me, radiating out from my genitals.
‘My whole body spasmed – in a really nice way – and I went rigid all over. ‘Then the sensation peaked. My eyes rolled back in my head, my groin pushed upwards, and I felt flushed all over. I was expecting to ejaculate but I didn’t, yet I’d just had the most amazing whole body orgasm. It was mind blowing!’

Quoted extract from a Metro article, available here.

I have helped many clients achieve a full body orgasm also known as an energy orgasm.

Here are 5 elements which are part of the pathway to reaching a full body energy orgasm experience.

There are more tips which I can share with you during your tantric massage appointment with me.

1. Playing with high and low arousal many times before the final release

For men and women the experience and pathway to a full body orgasm is different, this is because for men it can be easier to reach 80% of their climax and then calm things down in a cycle of high arousal and low arousal to reach their peak climax in a final crescendo. It’s vital to hold back a number of times before reaching the final peak, this is one of the key elements to reaching a full body orgasm.

For women once they are in the zone of high arousal to slow things down can feel frustrating when all you want is to go over the edge of arousal into orgasm. It can take more care and attention to practice a cycle of high arousal and low arousal to reach a full body orgasmic sensation.

The ebb and flow of arousal, reaching a high peak and then slowing things down in a way which feels good and pleasurable is part of reaching a full body orgasm.

2. Not being goal orientated, releasing any expectations

Focusing so hard on an outcome will not help you achieve a full body orgasm. You need to be open to whatever happens in the tantric session. Sometimes it takes people a few tantric massage experiences before their body and full being is ready or prepared to experience a full body orgasm.

Releasing any expectations you have, being open to the experience and being willing to try the breathing exercises your therapist will recommend are all fundamental to the full body orgasm experience in a tantra massage.

3. Breathing

Yes, this is part of achieving a full body orgasm. Being open to practicing full and deep breaths throughout the tantric massage and especially during peaks of arousal and low arousal, playing with the arousal energy.

Breathing techniques are used within yoga and meditation, and the benefits of deep breathing have been recognised by the SAS and Navy Seals.

Navy Seals use a 4 x 4 breathing method, breathing in for four counts and breathing out for four counts.

4. Feeling relaxed

The massage part of the tantra experience will help you and your whole body feel relaxed. A full body massage where your entire self is being tended to with caring touch and relaxing massage strokes for an hour or more will help bring you into deep relaxation.

5. Time

All of the above elements take time, tantric full body massage, entering a relaxed state, free of expectations, practicing deep breathing, as well as playing with high and low arousal cycles.

If you are prepared to set aside quality time and let your tantric therapist guide you, then the experience of a full body orgasm can be yours. This is not something which can be rushed.

A full body energy orgasm is possible if you truly let go, surrender and let the tantric massage experience envelop you, wrap around you.

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Breathing Together as Foreplay

March 23, 2019March 28, 2020

There’s something very erotic and sensual about breathing in unison with your lover.

It’s a connecting moment where you are paying attention to each other and bringing your energy together. Breathing in this way can feel playful, sensual and joyful.

You may feel self conscious or silly asking your partner to sit with you and breath together. Many partners find it difficult to even look at each other directly in the eye for anything more than a brief moment. They are unable to truly look and gaze into the eyes of their lover, drinking in what they see and build that intimate connection.

When we did lose our ability to really connect with each other? How did we lose the ability or willingness to be close? What events could have taken that away from you? I will let you consider that for yourself as we are all individual and the reasons for why we push people away or don’t let them close is different for everyone. The first step is being aware whether you are truly allowing yourself to be connected with and have the door open to connecting with your intimate partner.

When you are ready to begin this journey of true intimate connection then I recommended the following playful and erotic breathing experience.

Before you begin really ask yourself, am I open to connecting with this person and letting them in? The answer needs to be a joyful and accepting yes. If it isn’t then it sounds like you are not ready for this, take a step back and think about what is holding you back.

Here’s a step by step guide to breathing together and eye gazing with your lover.

1. Intention and permission

Permission
For you both to come together this was way there needs to be permission given to enter into this experience. There is an equality in this experience, a balance. There is not a moment of euphoria for one and not the other. You both share in this experience equally at the same time.

Ask each other, “can I sit with you and can we try breathing together?” or “can we share in this experience of siting together and looking into each other’s eyes, I want to feel close to you?”

Set your intentions
You are here to truly accept the person before you and for yourself to be unconditionally accepted. If you have resentment or anger towards the person in front of you, then you cannot truly accept them. Coming together in this way needs a clean slate. There needs to be a forgiveness of anything which has so far not been forgiven.

When your intention is to unconditionally accept the person before you, then you are ready to begin.

2. Space

Create a warm and inviting space which is comfortable for you both to sit close together.

3. Position

Sit together in a comfortable position, where you can both see each other’s face. You can sit cross legged together or entwined, whatever feels comfortable for both of you.

4. Touch

Place your hand on each other’s chest. You may want to place your hands on each other’s heart. You may want to ask each other’s permission before you do this “can I touch you here?” or “can I connect with you?” whatever permission language works for you and your partner.

5. Sight

Hopefully you have already been looking at each other and not elsewhere. Now that you have connected through touch you can connect intentionally through sight.

Look at your partner’s face, and focus on their eyes. Look into their eyes with your intention of acceptance, care and joy. You may want to pick one of their eyes to focus on, and take these moments to truly look at each other. It may take practice to feel very comfortable doing this. Looking into your partner’s eyes builds intimacy.

6. Breathe

You can add breathing together. Take a deep slow breath in unison and exhale together. If it helps count to five in your mind to inhale and count five to exhale. Pay attention to how your partner breathes and mirror their slow and deep breath. You can try different breathing exercises together, for example your partner takes a breath first and exhales, as they exhale you inhale. This breath exercise can feel like a wave of energy between you.

When you approach these activities they are not to be thought of as chores or tasks, take a playful approach, it does not have to be perfect, adapt this to work for you. The most important element is the intention to unconditionally accept each other.

When you have experienced looking into each other’s eyes, breathing together and being with each other in this way, it is possible for your empathy and emotions towards your lover to open up in new ways.

Try it. It might be daunting at first. Follow this guide to help you along the way. Breathing together can bring a deeper sense of intimacy between you and your partner.

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Erections, that Blue Pill and Mindfulness

March 29, 2019March 28, 2020

Erection unpredictability (EU) can be infuriating, especially when medical professionals tell you that the problem is in your head or stress related. Those who struggle with EU want solutions and want to know it’s fixable. In many cases of erectile unpredictability people turn to that blue pill Viagra, which seemingly makes the problem disappear.

But when you simply take a pill rather than putting in the work of actively managing EU, you’re not solving your underlying problem. Instead, you are masking it by taking a pill to treat the symptom, not the cause. The benefits of that blue pill are short lived, and you do not want to become reliant on that pill. It’s better to move towards a place of health and wellbeing, where you can enjoy erectile health.

I have have worked with many clients over a number of sessions to help them through unpredictable erections. Let me be clear, there is no quick fix. Each session focuses on bringing you to a place of relaxation and arousal. The sessions include using relaxing massage, breathing techniques and mindfulness, being present in the moment, to work with you and your body.

Many people come to me with an expectation in their mind that they can fix this quickly. It is best to suspend all expectations or goals and approach each session as an exploration of new sensations.

If people bring a mindset of ‘this is work’, or ‘I must’ or ‘this is something I need to fix now’ it will hold you back. Instead a mindset of being open to try new things, being willing to take things slow, relaxing into it, letting go and letting your tantric therapist look after you, will help you move towards what you desire.

Mindfulness is being aware of yourself, your environment and those around you and can be used for help erection unpredictability. Mindfulness is a tool you can use on your journey towards erectile health. As you start to practice mindfulness, you can bring mindfulness and the focus it gives you into the bedroom. When you do, you can focus more on pleasure and on sensations rather than on performance.

Those struggling with erectile unpredictability tend to be fixated on their performance in the bedroom. When you worry about your performance with your partner, you disconnect yourself from being in the moment and instead worry about if it’s going to be a success. You take yourself out of what should be more of a flow state.

Flow is a term used in positive psychology that refers to the mental state you are in when you’re fully immersed in an activity also known and being present in the moment, or being mindful.

When you are fully immersed in an experience, the flow and feeling present in the moment you’re not worrying about what might or might not happen. Instead, you’re experiencing and hopefully enjoying all of the various sensations that you are feeling. You’re trusting your body to do what it needs to do. You are not over thinking it.

Tantric massage techniques, combined with mindfulness, being present in the moment, suspending the idea of performance, and being open to trying new things can help those with erectile unpredictability.

There is the potential to transform your experience using relaxing massage, breathing techniques and being present in the moment, to work with you and your body.

Your Tantric Massage Experience

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Love Maps; what informs our desires?

April 21, 2019March 28, 2020

“Psychologists commonly hold that, for both women and men, internal fantasies are drawn from our unique ‘love maps’, a term first coined in 1980 by Dr. John Money of Johns Hopkins University to describe ‘the sexual temple expressed in every individual’s erotic fantasies and practices.’

In other words, our love maps describe the subconscious blueprint of our erotic desires. The love map lies at the root of our sexual preferences, explaining why we prefer one physical type over another and influencing our sexual fantasies and practices. Each of us has a distinctive love map, as unique as a fingerprint, but there’s no real consensus on exactly how our love maps or sexual templates are formed.

Some say early life experiences and impressions shape our love maps, beginning with an unconscious tendency to seek out characteristics found in our opposite sex parents. Fetishes also ostensibly derive from our experiences, when an early association of an object or image with a sexual stirring becomes emblazoned into our sexual psyche.

Others believe that our early pubescent masturbation fantasies forge our love maps. Early experiences that results in sexual stimulation and orgasms are instinctively repeated. Is it entirely circumstanial that a teenage boy first masturbates to a typical Playboy centrefold and is later drawn to busty blondes?

Others have the opinion that emotional cravings and unconscious psychological needs inform the love map. All of these theories have merit, and in my estimation there is some truth to each. In the end, our love maps are most likely a dynamic, ever-evolving confluence of factors.

This is why porn, particularly the ready access of Internet porn, is such a personal bete noire: It’s not just the simplistic, erroneous view of female sexuality that bugs me, but the degree to which it creates dependence on external triggers that can both obscure and override the organic development of the love map.

Men deprive themselves of the time to luxuriate in fantasies and desires that are personal and individual, and they frequently turn to the geric visuals of porn to catalyse the process. More and more men are turning away from their intimate relationships as a source of sexual exploration and settling instead for erotic junk food.”

An extract from Passionista: The Empowered Woman’s Guide to Pleasuring a Man by Ian Kerner, Ph.D.